By Sue Guillory
Americans can learn a lot about networking from Italy.
Want to get more small business customers? You'll probably be advised to start networking. You'll be urged to attend industry events and business meetings and start handing out business cards. Get involved in social media conversations and find ways to show people how your product can solve their problems. Get actively involved, if you like.
As a foreigner and entrepreneur living in Italy, I have to say: Americans totally get this point wrong. Let me explain.
In America, networking is entirely for self-interest.
To be honest, when I go to networking events, instead of thinking about how I can help the people I meet, They are can help you. Perhaps you are attending the event because you are looking for more customers or potential business partners.
This is made worse by the fact that everyone around you is also trying to get their own needs met, meaning you end up with a room full of people who are only there for their own ends and don't really care about helping each other.
I remember attending a networking event many years ago and seeing a woman tossing her business card after business card at every bewildered attendee without introducing herself or engaging in conversation, and I was so appalled by the way she did it that I threw her business card in the nearest recycling bin.
I still think about her and wonder if she ever saw the error of her ways, that, as I learned during my time in Italy, the way she was trying to find new clients was the exact opposite of what actually works when it comes to networking.
Networking is natural in Italy and is a win-win
I can’t tell you how many times here someone has done something for me out of kindness. When I go to the farmers market and ask for one tomato, the farmer scratches his head (why would anyone want just tomatoes in Italy?). One Tomatoes?) and waves off my efforts to pay.
No, Signora. Prego.
No, ma'am. Please, take it.
Who do you think I will be looking for next time I’m at the market?
And whenever I say I need something (house, help with paperwork, advice on choosing a doctor, etc.), everyone I talk to immediately calls a cousin or friend to help me. Because of those calls, I get red carpet treatment just because I'm considered part of the family.
I like to call it “I got a guy,” and if you pronounce it with a Brooklyn accent, it might make sense.
Need a mechanic you can trust?
There's a man.
Want the best tasting fish in town?
There's a man.
You get the picture. In Italy, everyone has the perfect guy (or girl) for their job. You might think it might be awkward to work with someone you've been introduced to (if your cousin Vinny isn't actually such a good mechanic), but I didn't think so, because in Italy, at least in the countryside in Southern Italy, everyone knows someone. If Vinny didn't do a good job fixing my car, I would tell at least 10 people. Those 10 people would tell their cousin, and by that time Vinny's would be closed.
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How can I be “that guy”?
If you were to apply this “I’ve got a good guy” mentality to a new approach to networking, what would it look like?
“Being the best” simply means providing the best product with the best customer service. It may seem like you're doing it out of kindness, without any regard for profit. Throw in a freebie with an order. Make a follow-up call to make sure the customer is satisfied. Share your contact information with a customer who needs “the best” for something else.
True networking is a long-term game
Another thing that's different about Italian business, and something Americans can learn from, is that things don't move quickly. As we've said, people do things for reasons other than money. That means in business, it may take longer to close a deal than you would normally allow.
I would argue that Americans have something to learn from this. In your business world, what if you slowed down and got to know your potential customers more thoroughly before you pressured them into signing a contract? How well could you meet your customers' needs if you actually took the time to listen to their concerns?
Viewing business negotiations and networking as an opportunity to connect with others (rather than simply putting money in your pocket) will fundamentally change the way you do business, making it better for everyone involved.
So take a few lessons from the Italians: Take the pace slowly, get to know people to build a genuine network, and find a way to help without worrying about the potential revenue.
By becoming the best at what you do, you will become an honorable Italian, willing to help others without any personal gain, and you will find yourself getting more work than you can handle. You won't even need to hand out business cards.
About the Author
Sue Guillory Su is an expat coach and business content creator who supports women who want to move to Italy. Su has also appeared in AllBusiness, Forbes, SoFi, Lantern, Nav, and more, writing about entrepreneurship, finance, marketing, and life as an expat in Italy.
Related: 6 practical tips for doing business with Italian companies
